Cognitive Astigmatism

What They See Is Not What They'll Get

“I like to describe myself as a proudly visible member of the most invisible segments of our society - older women.” - Cindy Gallop

Comments about childless cat ladies have been gnawing at my craw. Why? Probably because I realized that in my haste to defend the choice not to have children I failed to mention the many and glorious ways older women are perfectly positioned to topple the status quo. I also realized that many men in this country are in for a rude awakening.

These men are stuck in what I call Cognitive Astigmatism, a condition characterized by an inability to think or see beyond the confines of their dirt and sweat-stained cages. The walls of these cages were formed in childhood - applied layer-by-layer, year after year - composed of prejudice, anger, and fear of differences. Later, they were reinforced by religious doctrine, right-wing media, and the siloed thinking of the dementia impaired. At this point, the walls are almost opaque - scratched, warped, and cloudy with the steamy breath of their captives pressing their faces against the glass trying to see a way out.

One of the strongest materials used in the construction of these cages was beliefs about women. Subjugation and control reinforced a sense of safety. Being able to wound a woman made their own pain more tolerable. But at this point the air in the cages is stultifying - fetid and rank with the smell of unwashed bodies and testosterone delirium. It is hard to breathe and the plan to restore order by putting women back in their places is backfiring. They are literally suffocating.

When I began thinking about how to portray cognitive astigmatism, I tried to imagine the view from the cages of men suffering from this affliction. “How do they see women who have chosen not to have children,” I wondered, “women who love their cats (and dogs) like children, and choose to focus on exploring their own lives rather than raising others?”

Images of thin, frail, and wrinkled elderly women immediately came to mind. But as soon as I cleared my mind of all the cultural white noise - of the judgment, shame, and disgust heaped on women for aging - I felt a deep and abiding power percolating just below conscious thought. I felt like I did as a kid when I was introduced to a delicious new chocolate (dark vanilla cream) or a perfume that whisked me away to places I never knew existed. It’s this power - composed of wisdom, compassion, and resilience - that older women carry within their cells. It is the silent, blue-eyed panther infusing their hearts with courage - here to remind us that love is always stronger than hate.

The result of all this thinking, feeling, and imagining is the card you see at the top of the post and in smaller form below. It says what I want to say to everyone reading my Stack - reject cognitive astigmatism, break out of plexiglass prisons, and remember that real power is not the result of restricting the freedoms of others - it’s born of love, appreciation, and respect. Go claim it.

Copies of this image can be purchased as either large (7.1 x 5.5) or small (5.5 x 4.25) postcards here: https://jenaball.wixsite.com/savage-voices/resources

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Recommended Reading

• You Better Be Lightning by Andrea Gibosn

• Silenced No More by Gloria Horton-Young

• Bold Defiant Women by Gloria Horton-Young

• Oldester Magazine by Sari Bottom

• What Do We Need Men For - A Modest Proposal by E. Jean Carroll

• Mighty Gorgeous by Amy Ferris

• Who Could Ever Love You by Mary Trump

• Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estés

P.S. Got others to add to the reading list? Add the names and authors in comments and we’ll start building a library!

Copyright 2024 by Jena Ball. All Rights Reserved.

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