“Some people are in such utter darkness that they will burn you just to see a light. Try not to take it personally.” - Kamand Kojouri
The next time I visited Buttons and Bows I was alone. The holidays were coming up and I wanted to get gift shopping out of the way so I could enjoy celebrating with the cadre. I was hoping the Proprietress might give me a sneak peek at upcoming styles that no one had seen yet, but instead of greeting me with her usual welcoming smile, I found her sitting on the bar stool behind the checkout counter staring off into space. Even the cheerful tinkle of the little bell above the shop door didn’t disturb her reverie.
“Everything okay?” I asked as I approached the counter. “You look lost in thought.”
“Oh, hello!” the Proprietress said with a smile. “Sorry I was just thinking about the latest story I’ve been trying to create a design for.”
“Judging by the expression on your face, it’s not a pleasant one.”
“Well…let’s just say it is complicated - traumatic, inspiring, and heartbreaking all at once.”
“Wanna share?” I asked. “I’m not an artist but I can give you some feedback.”
“That would be very helpful, thank you,” she said, gesturing towards the other stool behind the counter. “Have a seat.”
When I was sitting, she picked up the sheets of paper on the counter in front of her. “I think I’d better read it to you first. I haven’t had a chance to digest it well enough to tell it as a story.”
“That’s fine,” I said. “Whatever works.”
“Okay,” the Proprietress said. “Here goes. One Woman’s Story by Tizz O’Toole. ”
NOTE: Part I of Blindsided was written by contributing author, Tizz O’Toole,
One day, not so long ago, a young single mom went on a date. Her date was a man she knew professionally for many years. He took her to dinner at a local restaurant and night club. After dinner, she excused herself to use the restroom. When she returned, she was delighted to find that her date had ordered a bottle of champagne. This was a new experience, and it made her feel very special. When she approached the table, her handsome and very distinguished-looking date stood up and handed her a glass of champagne. She felt dazzled by his attentiveness. She smiled and thanked him, then sat down across from him. They shared a little table on a raised deck between the restaurant and night club. There was a clear view of the dancers in the club and of the stairs leading outside. The young woman felt like a princess. As she drank, she watched the dancers. Her date said little, but he smiled at her often across the table. For years she had had a secret crush on this handsome man. Over the months leading up to this night, he began to pay her little compliments. She was thrilled when he asked her out on a date. She felt shy with him, and stole glances at him as she drank her champagne. Candlelight glinted from his dark eyes and hair, and the young woman knew she could easily fall in love with him.
What happened next happened very quickly. The room began to swim. She felt sick. She stood up and tried to run to the bathroom, but her legs barely supported her. Her date rushed to her side and held her up. He guided her down the stairs to the door. She felt like she was hearing and seeing the world from inside a muffled jar that was melting. She heard, as though from a great distance, her date laughing and talking with someone.
“Cheap date,” he said. “Too much to drink — real cheap date.”
An unknown time later, she woke on the floor of a van. Her stockings and one shoe were gone and her skirt was bunched at her waist. The back door of the van was open and she knew immediately where she was and what had happened. The van was parked next to where she met her date earlier in the night. She heard someone outside the van urinating on the ground. This was her only chance. She carefully looked around until she found her purse. Thank god, her keys were inside. She grabbed her keys and lurched out the back door. She felt sick and disoriented but the adrenaline helped counteract the drug. She dropped her purse, but she ignored it and kept running. She still held her keys. As she ran across the parking lot to her car, the sharp gravel cut her feet but she hardly noticed it. She heard him shout and give chase. She just managed to unlock the door and scramble inside before he caught up with her. She locked the door before he could open it. He shouted at her to wait. He held her shoe and purse in one hand. She nearly hit him as she jammed the stick shift into reverse and slammed her foot on the gas.
She had little memory of the drive home. It was a familiar route, the same she took to and from work every day. When she got home, she thanked her two friends for minding the kids. They laughed when they saw her disheveled appearance and joked about what a wild date it must have been. She laughed with them, thanked them again, and said goodbye. When they left, she locked the door, and then checked every lock on every door and window. She turned off all the lights and sat down in her favorite chair in the dark. She lit a cigarette. The glowing tip in her shaking hands made patterns in the dark, like some angry red firefly. She stared out at the night.” - Tizz O'Toole
Stay tuned for Part II dropping tomorrow…
Got a Cadre of Your Own?
Seed of Possibility posters and tees can be purchased via the links below.
Copyright 2024 by Jena Ball. All Rights Reserved.
My daughter knows the rules--she never takes a glass of anything--even water--from someone. She and her college friends knew to be exceptionally careful at parties, and my girl was always the sober one, watching over her flock of friends to make sure they were safe. What kind of a horrible world do we live in? What's wrong with these boys/men?
🌹